"Idaho Sen. Larry Craig, a married, very anti-guy conservative Reublican, was arrested by a plainclothes police officer for lewd conduct in a Minneapolis airport men's room. Today the senator's office said it was all a big misunderstanding. Apparently what happened was when the senator went in to use the restroom, he accidentally grabbed the wrong penis." --Jay Leno

"Larry Craig, the conservative senator and hardcore heterosexual from Idaho, insists that he is not gay.

In fact, he's anti-gay marriage and anti-gays in the military. He's anti-gay everything but sex." --Jimmy Kimmel

"All of Boise, Idaho, is a buzz with the story of Larry Craig. ... The police report says he tapped his foot, which means 'I want gay sex.' And, also means I'll never wear my iPod to the bathroom again." --Jimmy Kimmel

"Needless to say, Senator Craig is also anti-gay marriage and gays in the military, which I think, shows he doesn't let his personal needs interfere with his work." --Jimmy Kimmel

"There's another scandal in Washington. One of the senator's from Idaho, Larry Craig, was arrested in airport men's room. Gives new meaning to the word caucusing.'" --David Letterman

"Sen. Craig said he made a mistake by pleading guilty. And I was thinking, maybe that was your second mistake." --David Letterman

"The way I look at it, anyone who spends more than two minutes in an airport men's room is guilty of something." --David Letterman "My idea of getting lucky in the men's room is when the motion censor works on the faucet" --David Letterman

"There's a very simple explanation for all of this.

Larry Craig is gayer than a barrel of Andy Dicks." --Jimmy Kimmel

"The undercover police officer said the senator tried to reach under "the stall to touch him, but the senator said, no, he wasn't trying to touch him, he was only trying to pick up a piece of paper off the floor. Who picks up paper off the floor in the men's room? I don't even like when my shoe laces touch the floor in the men's room." --Jay Leno

"You know who I feel sorry for in this whole thing? The undercover cop. How'd you like to have that job. Sit in an airport bathroom all day, your pants around your ankles with a coffee and a donut waiting for guys to hit on you." --Jay Leno

"Sen. Craig is married. Apparently he told his wife, don't worry about having dinner ready to me. I'm going to wolf down a hot dog at the airport." --Jay Leno

"The Democrats may have control of the House, but the Republicans have control of the bathrooms." --Jay Leno

"Sen. Craig gave a press conference today where he said, I'm not gay, I've never been way. Then he apologized to his wife, Liza Minelli." --Jay Leno

~Compiled by Daniel Kurtzman